Hmm, so I don't want to start off posting in this thread again by sounding down and pessimistic--'cause that doesn't reflect my real attitude well. Summer Galaxian tends to be in a little more optimistic mood than Schooling Galaxian, y'know.
So I'll start off with this--I think my planning skills are improving. Like, even though it's the type that I've always been not too bad at, it's good because anything improving is a good thing.

But on the down note,,, I haven't been able to write for the most ridiculous amount of time. I sit down and I try to jot down everything, but other than for planning, I can't get anywhere. I just sit there and wallow and sometimes, when I'm actually feeling down randomly, I berate myself for being useless and stupid and all that.
Well, I guess a part of it probably is my fault, but it's probably not entirely, right? Maybe my mind's trying to make some huge realization that will lead to improvement? (*skeptical laughter*)

-Galaxian-

I wanna say that I really appreciate the response and advice, but ironically, my usual problem is that once I'm done with the exciting parts my mind goes, like: :w--on me xD, so I actually need to focus on the boring parts first though that never goes particularly well lol
sdijmsduiofkosdjof Writing anything down,,, but honestly when my writing's like this, it sucks to the point that its existence is a disgrace to the English language and even the alphabet xD it's really bad. Well, I guess I can't just wallow forever. I'll see what I can do, lol. I can't just let myself be petty in this way for eternity.

-Galaxian-

This is the type of crap stuff that comes out when I try to write quickly, lol.
Just a small anecdote of sorts.
(Honestly there are many more examples on my homethreads. Not every post is like that, of course. Just the ones where you look at them and can tell I tried, but failed.)

----

They reminded me of speckles of black sesame seeds. Tiny and barely able to be seen on top of (and sometimes within) the excess mounds of salt, there was no sign that life could come from them. To be frank, they seemed more like appetizers for fish. With a pang, I realized that they could be fish food--just when the tiny organisms in them hatched out and grew, not now. The fact that they could be eaten only after already experiencing more of life made me feel a little nauseous.
The black specks were actually brine shrimp eggs. They were here for an observation lab for AP Environmental Science. But that was really only an excuse for me, really. Screw any scientific progress that could possibly be made in this lab; I was here for seeing shrimp and I knew it. To my credit, I hadn't denied --and wouldn't deny--my own bias. It was too obvious, after all.
Days passed as I anxiously ran over to the small-sized bag every day, holding it carefully up towards the nearby lamp to see what was going on. Being a little dense in the head, I wasn't really sure what I was looking for, exactly, but at least I was bright enough to figure out that if something other than the water moved, then that would probably be what I was looking for. And finally, one day, I saw exactly that.
It wasn't exactly "something." It was many things. I saw so many specks of white, littler than the black specks in the salt dunes, seemingly floating around the water. But when I put the bag down and let the water still, the white specks still moved. I, on the other hand, grinned as hard as I could and shouted for my mom to come see.
We both agreed that it seemed like a miracle. Maybe any process like birthing and hatching would be, admittedly, but it was still spectacular to see the tiny shrimp swimming around. I could watch for hours on end (and that's when I had to bemoan the existence of homework specifically). I watched them until my eyes got so tired of focusing on moving small spots that they tried to cross to get me to look somewhere else.
In the meantime, the shrimp hatched, more and more of them. They were so much that if I looked at the corners where the hatched eggs were floating atop the water's surface, I could see swarms of white specks nosing their way through the eggs. It was a little bothersome the more I let my imagination wander as to what exactly they were doing, so mostly I dedicated myself to focusing on all the swarms of white.
Until one day, they weren't swarms anymore.
I don't know what exactly happened. I just know that every time I looked into the bag, the specks of white seemed to suddenly decrease in number. The decrease was so insubstantial at first that I thought I was mistaken. But the decreases grew more and more noticeable, until at one point I could only find the shrimp by looking for them.
There were so many emotions. I dared not look into the salt dunes out of fear that I would see tiny, undeveloped corpses as white as the salt piles. I dared not accidentally shake the water and propel those tiny bodies into the water above, into a scene much like ghosts trying to rejoin the living that I would then have to see. I feared how I would react if I saw it. So I didn't make any opportunity to see it.
Coward as I was, one might think that I ceased looking at the bag any longer, or at least I ceased making any extraneous observations that were not required of my science class. Coward as I was, though, I didn't do that. I knelt by the bag every day and I watched the remaining ones grow, still with the fondness and anticipation I'd had when the "experiment" had begun.
Shrimp, or at least brine shrimp, grow very quickly. I still can't describe how fast they seemingly expanded from their tiny bodies into creatures that I could pinpoint without specifically looking for them. I could just fix my eyes on the center and wait for my eyes to react to movement. But now most of the shrimp were gone, and there were only around three. I tried not to think about numbers and more about swimming. I marveled at how fast such tiny creatures could swim. I thought that they were examples of how every species of nature can really be called marvels of nature in their own ways.

(TBC)

My teacher, commenting on a short satirical piece I wrote: Great detail and descriptions!
Me, who suddenly remembers the 'satire' was literally just me roasting the readers for 3 paragraphs because I wrote it at 2 A.M. with no proofreading process while writing it:

-Galaxian-